Checking In

I know I have MIA lately but as a stated before school is back and I'm so BUSY right now we are already on week 5! I don't have any marriage thoughts this week. I just wanted to give a update on our adventures to becoming homeowners. We are on a tight budget and when we first started this process it was fun and exhilarating but now I am just ready to move. We have looked at what seems like a million houses even though the market is good for buying but a lot of the homes are forecloseures and that's good and bad. So to say the least I have gained patience through this process. After submitting 6 bids we finally got an acceptance for our offer which I am estatic about. It's not really in a area that I love b/c of how far I have to drive to school and work but I have to get out of my comfort zone at sometime. Its a starter house and we both are students so we had to put all the variables in place. We were going to buy a condo but decided on a single-family instead. I am so excited to move and decorate. Hopefully all goes well with the appraisal and inspection and we can close sometime in October!

Here is our new home hopefully if all goes well!

Thursday Thoughts #8

I am on point this week! So my FI and I had a disagreement this week so my thoughts are about fighting fair in marriage and relationships. Here is what I found somewhat helpful.

1. Deal With The Issue Quickly – don’t let it linger indefinitely
2. Deal With Only One Issue At A Time – don’t “kitchen sink” your partner by bringing up everything you’ve been upset about
3. Avoid “Put Downs” and Generalizations – avoid words like “you always, you never, you are always right or wrong, good or bad,” etc.
4. Listen Without Interrupting – take turns listening and ask questions to clarify what’s being communicated.
5. Don’t Fight In Front Of Your Kids – arguing in front of your children is child abuse. They don’t want to hear it anyway.
6. Don’t Bring Up Past Mistakes, Hurts, or Issues From The Past – don’t dig up the past. Stay in the present with the topic at hand.
7. Avoid Name Calling and Personal Insults – name calling and personal insults might help you to win the argument but may also cause you to lose your marriage.
8. Make It A “Win-Win” Outcome For Both of You – you can only win if you both win.

Now that I have these little tips I will try to implement them! Off for now I have an exam tomorrow!

PARTY'S OVER!

so yesterday was my mom's 50th b-day and as you know i had planned a little party for her. she is not one for a lot of attention so we tried to keep it simple. here are some of my fav pics from the party. remember this is the photog doing our free ePics session next month.

My Mom

Tablescape

Mom and me

Guest sign-in mat

My bros, mom, and me

What's the 4-1-1

Wedding planning has been on the back burner lately. School has taken over but I am still trying to find a fab photog to take our second ePic session. No luck yet we may end up using our wedding photog but I am one of those people who want all their pics and the DVD is an extra $375 and I can't afford it. The alternative is to just order prints which is really not much more cost effective so I have been hitting Craigslist and talking to other's for referrals. My mom's 50th B-Day Party is this sunday and I don't feel like I have everything together. But I'm trying. The photog that we are using for my mom's b-day is the one that is doing our free ePic session in Oct. Other than waiting on taking the pics and getting the STDs designed that's all I have been working on.

Here is a pic of the b-day party invite!

PENDING VENDORS - I have a vendor/ideas in mind just haven't confirmed with them yet! Still debating.....

DJ

Baker

Video

Invite design

DOC

THINGS TO DO

Shop for wedding bands- have FI designed

Shop for dresses - starting in december

Find an officiant -ASAP (start PMC soon)

Right now I am on PROJECT FI's 30th B-Day PARTY!! I have a theme without a venue so I may have to change theme to fit location. I can't design invites without a theme so I am so screwed not to mention tons and tons and tons and school assignments!! Just pray for me.... Off to figure this out and read about pharmacokinetics....

Thursday Thoughts #7 ( on a FRI )

ok so i am going to have to change thursday thoughts because school is in and thursday's are my looonnng days. first off i want to say that i completed my 4 days of cardio this week YAY !!!! and truthfully i'm really believe it has helped with my stress level. school is a beast and yesterday i was seriously considering pushing the wedding back until jan when we will be on winter break. but for now we are going forth! i really want to get married in oct it has so much meaning for us so i'm going forth with my plans i can't let school run my life forever. but if i absolutetly have to push the date back my vendors all know so it will be ok as far as that is concerned.

anyway my thoughts on marriage is about decision making...

Sharing Responsibility for Decision Making

If either of you take on a dominating role and expect to make all the major decisions in your marriage, your marriage will suffer.

"Making decisions should be a shared responsibility. Studies have shown that the unhappiest people in a marriage are often those who have the burden of making decisions alone. In the most successful marriages, decision making is a shared activity."
"Another characteristic of a successful marriage is that both partners are sincerely concerned about the wishes and personal preferences of the other. They are both willing to go more than halfway in reaching mutually satisfying compromises. Decisions or compromises that are made are made willingly instead of grudgingly."
"Sharing decisions means that neither spouse has to be "wrong" or "lose." Both share the results. There is no resentment aroused by the attitudes of "who was right" and "who was wrong." There is the mutual growing together by the sharing in making "our decisions." Source: Mississippi State University Extension Service

Most of the time we make decisions together and but sometimes i get stuck with it and it sucks because i am a overanalyzer!! what are you thoughts about decision making w/in a relationship?

1 day @ a time: 1 meal @ a time

that's my daily mantra for weight loss. as you know i have been on and off with my weight loss for like 2-3 mths so now I'M BACK! on the AAW Board on TK we have a biggest loser challenge starting on monday so ihave already started back working our and i feel so much better. i have been so stressed with school ( i know already) and finding a house that i really needed an outlet to let off some steam. i have been using the gym @ schoola and not my gym and i love it. i am not fond of cardio and prefer to do strength training but we have TV's at each cardio station with DVDs on them so i don't even need my IPOD i just watch a movie or whatever i can find on that is interesting! it really helps make it through dreaded CARDIO! for the next 2 weeks i am going to do cardio only 4x per week and then start back strength training. the bl challenge runs until the december 15th. game on! hopefully we can all motivate each other.

so far this week i have worked out 3 x - 45 min cardio session on cross ramp elliptical and honestly i'm proud of myself. i only haven eated out once per day instead of 3x per day so that's a step. i have to remember or take the iniative to pack lunch. its hard but i feel ok this time around. i'm more dedicated right now i hope this lasts! wish my luck!!!!